Hugs & Kisses: The Valentine’s Day Luncheon 2010

by Julianna Squicciarini

Don’t know if you heard, but this is the third year in a row I’ve hosted my Valentine’s Day luncheon. Can you believe that?! I still remember when I first had this vision – where I was, what I was doing, how the idea formed in my mind…wow. And now, it’s really taken off and become something to which I look forward every year.

This time around, I sent out more invitations than I ever have in the past. The turnout was very good – 20 girls, including myself, plus my mother (representing my grandfather as a special guest) and my two speakers. Quick statistic: out of the twenty girls in attendance, without counting my own family, there were only three girls who had also attended the first two lunches. Isn’t it amazing how G-d moves us through different circles, bringing new people into our lives? My sphere of influence is apparently the same size as ever, but with an entirely new group of girls. It astonishes me.

This year, my aunt, Laura Guido, who is a happy, homeschooling mother of five, spoke. I was in her wedding, she was in my mom’s wedding - she and her family are beloved parts of our lives. Her talk centered around her testimony, how she eventually met her husband, and her marriage at the relatively late age of 30. I’m not sure about the other girls, but I find personal stories such as this very touching.

My other speaker was Denise Pohlman. Mrs. Pohlman is a member of our congregation. She is also a homeschool mom, and her family is in ATI (Advanced Training Institute). She is direct and wise, and I knew she would be able to easily share some nuggets of her wisdom with us. Her speech focused on the story of Ruth, using it as a springboard for teaching important truths, such as contentment and submission to authority.

The service at Maggiano’s Little Italy, where I held the event for the third year in a row, was as good as ever, and I do intend to go back there next year. In fact, I think I may have next year’s banquet planned down to the last detail right now. Makes things so much easier, you know?

All in all, I was very, very pleased with how things went. I can only pray that the lives, hearts, and souls of the girls in attendance were inspired, and that they were encouraged through these speeches, fellowship, and bonding time.

Oh, and by the way: many people ask me, “Why Valentine’s Day? Why focus on and celebrate this perverted, pagan holiday?” Good question. At this time of year, girls my age are bombarded by images of chocolate, roses, hearts, cute couples, lip prints, soft teddy bears, red-pink-and-white stuff, lace, etc. The list goes on and on. There’s no getting around the fact that the world is celebrating love. Just as my family and I fight the current around Christmas and Easter, and ignore the bunnies and Santa Clauses everywhere, we could do that now. We could close our eyes to this and stay holed up for two months, waiting for them to put away the hearts and pink M&Ms. But this holiday deals with our emotions. This holiday reaches into our hearts and tugs at our heartstrings, demanding a reaction. At this young and impressionable age, being the emotional creatures we know we are, there’s no way we can ignore it. That’s not how G-d made us! For many girls, being single and lonely on/around Valentine’s Day can be so depressing. So sad. A girl tends to feel ignored or rejected around this time of year. Sure, I could try doing this luncheon in September, so no one thinks I’m “celebrating” or “promoting” Valentine’s Day. But I think by the time the actual holiday rolled around, all the great ideas and truths learned at the luncheon would be faded and/or forgotten. I want to boost the confidence of these girls right now; I want them to feel accepted, loved, and pure NOW. I want them to know that waiting for the right man, living under their parents’ authority, with pure hearts and minds is the right thing to do, and I want them to walk into Valentine’s Day with smiles, not tears. Happiness, not depression. Pink M&Ms from me!

I hope that explains everything. I don’t want you to misunderstand my motives or practice; I know the roots of Valentine’s Day – the rights and wrongs of that are for another post, another time. I *do* happen to like the idea of celebrating your love for your spouse. Not everyone celebrates that every day, like my parents do. Is Valentine’s Day the right time to do it? Maybe, maybe not. Perhaps you see it as having a costume party toward the end of October. Could be mistaken for something it’s not, right? Could be taken as a stamp of approval on a holiday with which you don’t agree. Well, the main point of this luncheon is to take the focus off of “I’m single and my parents want me to be pure <gag>” and onto “I’m single! And G-d has the perfect guy for me! One day, I’ll be happily married, and while I wait for that day, I’m going to focus on serving others, obeyign & respecting my parents, and preparing to be and Excellent Wife!”

I hope and pray that’s what comes across to these young women. This could have been the best year yet. I’m just thanking G-d for working out all the kinks, and touching the lives of at least a few of the girls there. Success!

Semicentennial

An excellent father, who can find? For his worth is far above a Browning Citori shotgun.
The heart of his wife trusts in him, and he will have no lack of gourmet home-cooked meals.
He does her good and not evil all the days of his life.
He looks for watches and pocket knives and keeps them in a box on his dresser with delight.
He is like merchant ships; he orders his siddurim from afar.
He rises also while it is still night; and gives support to his clients and tasks to his staff members.
He considers a MINI Cooper and buys it; with his earnings he takes us out for fried zucchini at Maggiano’s.
He girds himself with strength, and makes his coffee strong.
He senses that his gain is good, and his lamp goes out earlier every night.
He stretches out his hand to the target, and his hands grasp a firearm.
He extends his hand to the keyboard, and stretches out his fingers to the mouse.
He is not afraid of the winter for his household, for his household can always put on more clothes.
Banana Republic makes coverings for him; his clothing is fine linen and cashmere (with the warmth of wool, the draping qualities of silk, and the wearability of cotton).
His wife is known in the Caribou, when she sits among the knitters of the land.
He makes a product locator and sells it, and supplies kiosks to Barnes & Noble.
Transparency and consistency are his trademarks, and he smiles at a good glass of red wine.
He opens his mouth in righteousness, and the teaching of history is on his tongue every Tuesday night.
He looks well to the ways of his household and does not eat cookies, candy, or any kind of crunchy food.
His children rise up and bless him, his wife also and she praises him saying:
“Many teachers have done nobly, but you talk more than all of them.”
“Men are liars,” “Looks don’t matter,” and “Nothing good happens after midnight…”
but a man who trains up his children in the way they should go shall stay young at heart and be cared for in his old age.
Give him the fruit of his own fig tree, and may he see his children to the third and fourth generations.
Happy birthday, Dad. We love you!

The Waiter

by Julianna Squicciarini

Some of you heard the humorous and interesting story about Tim the Waiter at Maggiano’s Little Italy. How his excellent service, charm, and depth took us by surprise. How we vowed to return and request him, since he was so good.  It has recently [as in, yesterday] come to our attention that Tim the Waiter no longer serves the general public at Maggiano’s Little Italy. He is gone without a trace; he has vanished into thin air, never to be seen or heard of again. We don’t even have a last name…or a phone number…or <sob> an email address! And so ends our fascination with Tim the Waiter, sadly. At a depressingly dead end. We’re close to offering a reward…

Endless Love – the Valentine’s Day Luncheon 2009

by Julianna Squicciarini

If you have been a faithful reader of this blog for the past year, you will remember that my first post ever was about the Valentine’s Day Luncheon I hosted last February. Unbelievable to think that it’s already been a year since then! Wow. Tempus fugit indeed.

Last Valentine’s Day, after the tremendous success of the luncheon, I decided to try and make it an annual event. Actually, I already had my speakers lined up! When my grandfather heard about last year’s event, he offered to speak at the next one and give a “man’s perspective” (every girl’s dream, right!?). I wrote it down, but I didn’t know if when the time came things would work out.

Well, they did. At the beginning of January, I leapt into party-planning mode and scheduled a room at Maggiano’s Little Italy. The food and atmosphere were so fantastic last year, I couldn’t think of a better place to host this. I prepared and mailed the invitations in one day; it took me two weeks last year (!). I invited about 50 young ladies of my acquaintance; I knew with the economy the way it is right now, I could expect a smaller turnout. I ended up with 20, plus myself and my two speakers. Not bad at all…

Which brings me to the delightful subject of my speakers. My grandfather, without a doubt, is the wisest man I know (see the previous post “Defining Terms“). I made sure everyone at the luncheon knew that before he spoke. When he visits our home, we feel like we should have a tape recorder handy, because everything he says is relevant and sound. I was honored that he spoke at this luncheon.
My other speaker was my father. His 35-minute talk was pretty much everything a girl would want to know about what a guy wants and what a guy needs. In the best sense, of course – nothing sketchy or risque He had the whole room laughing several times, which was fantastic.

And for those of you interested, both speeches were recorded and CDs are available upon request. Just let me know…

Once again, the event was sponsored by Quo Vadis LLC – IT professionals servicing small businesses here in the Charlotte area – and We Light the Candles – an online community providing connection and encouragement for women around the globe. Their support was much appreciated. And speaking of support, the whole thing wouldn’t have even taken off without my family. I love to plan. It’s my passion. But the execution is sometimes beyond me. My sisters displayed their love and encouragement for the past month through things like decorating the tables, taking pictures, and unexpected gifts. I feel so loved. And isn’t that the whole point of Valentine’s Day?!

Anyway, the purpose and idea behind this event is to encourage young women such as myself to use this time in their lives to prepare to be excellent wives, homemakers, and help-meets; to let their parents lead and protect them, especially when it comes to romance – love is SO blind! If I got that message across, it was a success again! I am looking forward, as always, to next year.