“Elusiveness”

by Mary Squicciarini

One of our friends recently finished reading The Scarlet Pimpernel by Baroness Emmuska Orczy, and as this lesser-known classic is a Squicciarini family favorite, we seized the opportunity to have him over for a showing of the 1982 film starring Anthony Andrews, Jane Seymour, and Ian McKellen. The evening included delicious homemade pizza, and a chance for our guest to try ”oil and vinegar” with his pizza crust… <raises eyebrows>…   

We (mostly) resisted the temptation to quote any of Sir Percy’s witty repartee during the movie. It was a disappointment to our guest that the “pepper-snuff” moment of genius was not included in the film, but overall he agreed that the acting and dialogue are superior. It is an excellent story of daring and great character…

We kicked him out of the house at 10:00, and as the evening was a great success, we’re already looking forward to next time. <grin>

Relatively Speaking

We had a family of total strangers over for dinner last night, and by the end of the evening we were not only related, but practically best friends as well. Truly. I mean, is that cool or what? It was like discovering long-lost cousins, and spending a few fantastic hours getting to know them… starting with their arrival at our home and introductions all around… then discussion of our mutual Italian heritage accompanied by screams of excitement as we found out that both of our families are descended from the Marzigliano famiglia of Bari, Italy. It was a beautiful time.  

This brings up what I like to call the Italian House theory (to unapologetically spoof a popular religious doctrine). It goes like this: if you feel a special sense of connection to an Italian family, such as ours – if you love being around them, guess what? You’re related. Absolutely. I guarantee it. (The real question is, how far back is your common ancestor… but trust me, chances are almost certain you can find one more recent than Noah).

Never Take Yourself Too Seriously: Part 3

It’s become a tradition at Squicciarini graduations that siblings of the graduate come forward and share a few words… memories, jokes, or other humorous anecdotes (referenced as “roasting” in my last post). This custom was first instituted at Julianna’s commencement in 2008, to great effect. At that time, the Squicciarini students had recently completed a course in public speaking, so they were able to easily put together short speeches which struck the perfect balance of sweet sentiment and comic relief. Well, maybe not easily… but we had fun doing it, no question, and Christine’s graduation was approached with the enthusiastic assurance that we would continue the tradition.

Since we have a suitable forum here, I plan to post each person’s speech for the enjoyment of those who couldn’t attend in person. Sit back… and imagine each one read aloud with the appropriate Squicciarini gestures and animation.

Never Take Yourself Too Seriously: Part 2

Christine sent a personal invitation to about fifty of our closest family friends, inviting them to her graduation ceremony at the lovely Courtyard Marriott in Ballantyne the evening of June 25.

As I noted in my facebook status on June 25, all day it felt like we were preparing for Christine’s wedding, instead of her graduation. (it was good practice, I observed.) Some of us had seized the chance to get new clothes for the event… <grin>… and everything was perfect - hair, nails, accessories… We arrived at the Courtyard shortly before 7pm, put everything in place, and waited for guests to arrive.

It was at this point, while we were intently focused on the graduation… that Michael Jackson had the nerve to die and thus steal the limelight.

People arrived, carefully dressed and full of warm wishes for Christine. The atmosphere was quiet, stately, almost regal, as everyone found a seat… there was a moment of brief silence… before Mary walked to the front and started speaking.

What she said was so funny that we all starting laughing, and from that point on it was an informal time of “roasting” Christine, reminding each other how great she is, and having cake (graduations appear to be inextricably tied to cake. Again, like weddings. You see my point here…)

When Christine got up to speak, she took a moment to collect herself, reviewing serious thoughts about life and the national economy which she was about to deliver… and then she looked up to see our entire family wearing either monkey masks or false noses (the kind with eyebrows and glasses attached). Yup, my mom’s idea. Never say we aren’t afraid to make fools of ourselves.

The evening ended in a happy glow – that’s the best way I can describe it. When time seems to slow down and all the sudden it’s late and you’re standing in the parking lot under the stars, happily chatting with friends, not wanting to say goodbye and have the sweetness of this time come to an end.

Supercalifragileisticexpealadocios

Random question… how many of you have ever had an anonymous gift from Tiffany’s show up on your doorstep?

It happened to us yesterday.

I tried so hard to convince everyone it was an early birthday gift for me… but I was overruled by the consensus that it was a graduation gift for Christine. <sigh>

This reminds me of the time we found a package containing $1000 in small bills… in our mailbox. (yeah, the “early birthday gift” line didn’t work then either…)

Basically we’re always finding stuff around our house. Sometimes it’s unpleasant, like mice in the pool, and other times it’s pretty nice, like presents or money. 

Never Stop Looking.

Requiescat ad infinitum

Today, June 27 2009, has been christened L’Olam Shabbat, a Hebrew phrase coined to distinguish this day as having the most daylight hours of Shabbat. It means Forever Shabbat, or the Shabbat that goes on… and on… and on. To give you an idea of the length we’re talking about, when we got up this morning – despite sleeping in (no alarm clocks on Shabbat) – there were nearly 12 remaining hours of Shabbat… 12 hours to rest, pray, read, study, eat, sleep, swim, talk, and laugh. By way of comparison, the shortest Shabbat in the year (or the one with least daylight hours) is about 8 to 8.5 hours long.

On one hand, 12 hours of Shabbat - wow, that’s amazing! You can get a lot done in so much time. It sounds like bliss. (But on the other hand, wow… that’s a long time.) If you haven’t ever spent 12 full hours (minus maybe one or two for a nap) in the close company of your immediate family, then you probably don’t have any idea what this day was like!

Disclaimer: although this post was written tongue in cheek, the day was truly pleasant, restful, and a delight – everything Shabbat should be.

My Father’s House: Part 3

A Sidebar to the Trip: Notes on Being a Squicciarini

Although to begin with we knew relatively few people there, no sooner had we walked in the door when we heard “Are you the Squicciarinis??!” Now, it is a commonly known fact that Squicciarinis love to be recognized. They love for a reputation to proceed them, provided it is not negative. They are touched, and sometimes tearfully appreciative, when strangers have taken care to learn the proper pronunciation of the famous Italian 12-letter name. They are never wallflowers; in fact, they enjoy being the center of attention. They have a smile and a greeting for everyone. They are spontaneous, warm-hearted, and lively. They understand what it means to be an example, a trendsetter, even a leader. They are cognizant that someone is always watching. They carry their distinctive name proudly, walking with confidence into unfamiliar territory. A true Squicciarini is never shy or bashful – these characteristics would go against the  intrinsic nature of their family, the very definition of what it means to be one of them. A true Squicciarini knows what it means to belong to a close family, the kind of family that happily spends time together, appreciates each other, has a home filled with laughter, and knows what it means to say ‘Blood is thicker than water’ and actually live it out. A true Squicciarini recognizes that he, or she, has unique qualities and a personality that stands out from the rest, yet at the same time, is part of a greater whole, a representative of the family at all times.

It was with this mindset, this unspoken statement of purpose, this “definition” if you will, that Julianna and I attended the FFOZ conference. We knew that our steps were directed. We went, we were ourselves, and we were genuinely thrilled to be there.

Saturday at The Residence

Stillness pervades our house through the early hours. The alarm clock doesn’t go off, the radio isn’t on… the only sounds are cars driving past outside. Sometimes the silence is broken by my brother softly playing his guitar, as everyone slowly wakes up. Eventually my father requests our presence downstairs (wink wink), and we spend about an hour at the breakfast table, usually having an informative discussion about current events. The recent trend has been international political figures.

I know, this sounds like a Norman Rockwell painting. Welcome to our life.

No matter how crazy the previous week has been, Saturday anchors us as a family. During the winter, we curl up in the family room and spend the day reading and studying together. Weather permitting, we take a walk through the neighborhood. The mood is tranquil, punctuated by occasional laughter or enthusiastic piano playing (courtesy of Peter). At some point during the day, we pray as a family.

Over the summer, we head outside mid-morning and spend most of the day around the pool. We listen to audio classes using our outdoor speakers while everyone enjoys the chance for repose and relaxation.

The goal for our Saturdays is peace. To accomplish that goal, we keep outside interference to a minimum… putting our phone on DND, taking a much-needed break from cell phones and email. This is our day of worship, and we set it apart by putting aside typical daily activities. Business is one topic we try not to talk about.

We have a sense of the inevitable when Saturday comes to an end… and as the sun sets, we recognize that our day of rest is over. There’s usually a stampede to the study, with shouts of “I have to turn off my auto-responder!!!” (a well-known euphemism for catching up on email and avoiding chores).

Never Go Against The Family

Similarities between two famous families:

• It hardly needs to be pointed out that both are Italian. Although we were infamously asked once if our name was Polish. <rolls eyes>
• Both have a successful family business. <wink wink>
• Both are benevolent dictatorships ruled by the patriarch.
• Both are well known in their respective communities.
• Both have excessive family loyalty.
• Both sprinkle their everyday conversations with little Italian phrases, like scusi and grazi.
• Both patriarchs can accomplish almost anything with a single phone call.
• Both have a trusted consigliare.
• Both are known for large, festive parties.
• Both have friends in the law enforcement and political sectors.
• Both are willing to do almost any favor for a friend.
• Both appreciate good wine.
• Both have the ability to get things done quickly and efficiently.
• Both know the usefulness of handguns.
• Both agree that Francis Ford Coppola’s 3-part masterpiece is timeless.

Well, that last one may not be technically true… but you get the idea.

Where Would We Be Without You?

In honor of Mary’s birthday, an excerpt from the Squicciarini Who’s Who:

Squicciarini, Mary Faith. Born January 25, Charlotte, NC. Fifth of five children. Blond hair, blue eyes. Currently 5’3″. Age 14, finally able to share clothes and shoes with her three sisters. As a child, best described as “diminutive” and “imperious,” anxious to assert her rightful importance in the family. A genius, according to her mother. American by birth, Italian by heritage, Narnian by choice. Hobbies: writing, photo editing, puzzles, reading C.S. Lewis, facebook, singing, crosswords, drawing, and swimming. Listens to: Josh Groban, Taylor Swift, Barry Manilow, the Narnia soundtracks. Known for: getting lost in her own world, flashes of creative brilliance, being both incredibly photogenic and analytical. Prediction: In 10 years she’ll be a member of Mensa, the Vice President of Quo Vadis LLC, an award-winning photographer, driving a pumpkin-colored Chevrolet Avalanche, and engaged to a guy named Ben who works at Windstream.

Happy Birthday… we love you.

BIRTHDAY, Mary.