Semicentennial

An excellent father, who can find? For his worth is far above a Browning Citori shotgun.
The heart of his wife trusts in him, and he will have no lack of gourmet home-cooked meals.
He does her good and not evil all the days of his life.
He looks for watches and pocket knives and keeps them in a box on his dresser with delight.
He is like merchant ships; he orders his siddurim from afar.
He rises also while it is still night; and gives support to his clients and tasks to his staff members.
He considers a MINI Cooper and buys it; with his earnings he takes us out for fried zucchini at Maggiano’s.
He girds himself with strength, and makes his coffee strong.
He senses that his gain is good, and his lamp goes out earlier every night.
He stretches out his hand to the target, and his hands grasp a firearm.
He extends his hand to the keyboard, and stretches out his fingers to the mouse.
He is not afraid of the winter for his household, for his household can always put on more clothes.
Banana Republic makes coverings for him; his clothing is fine linen and cashmere (with the warmth of wool, the draping qualities of silk, and the wearability of cotton).
His wife is known in the Caribou, when she sits among the knitters of the land.
He makes a product locator and sells it, and supplies kiosks to Barnes & Noble.
Transparency and consistency are his trademarks, and he smiles at a good glass of red wine.
He opens his mouth in righteousness, and the teaching of history is on his tongue every Tuesday night.
He looks well to the ways of his household and does not eat cookies, candy, or any kind of crunchy food.
His children rise up and bless him, his wife also and she praises him saying:
“Many teachers have done nobly, but you talk more than all of them.”
“Men are liars,” “Looks don’t matter,” and “Nothing good happens after midnight…”
but a man who trains up his children in the way they should go shall stay young at heart and be cared for in his old age.
Give him the fruit of his own fig tree, and may he see his children to the third and fourth generations.
Happy birthday, Dad. We love you!

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2 thoughts on “Semicentennial

  1. THIS was SO cute!

    Hey btw, I was emailing Julianna back and forth, and I’ve been trying to email her again for the past few months, and I keep getting an email back pretty much saying my email’s been blacklisted. Julianna…. I get it… stop trying to be cute. It’s only funny the first time! 😀 lol. Anyways, I can’t contact her and am quite bummed and stumped as to what I should do!


    Alyssa in Michigan

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